past week wasnt smooth sailing. but pretty eventful.
we started a new phase. and the real thing started. but before that, i couldnt resist playing street during one of the nights and got whacked in the face by an arm while defending a shot. some part of my tongue was bitten off.
woke up the next day with a bad sore throat. so my entire mouth was killing me. but i still went gyming and resulted in soreness in every inch of muscle. the chin up regime started and my arms were about to explode. but then came the freak incident bayonet to stab my dear right palm 2cm deep. perhaps even deeper. no stitches required since the palm auto closes when left on its own. and so, i became a left hander since that day.
yep that just added to my list of injuries sustained over my very loooongg 19years. i m not careless, i m just plain stupid.
booked out and watched sorcerer's apprentice. it was an okay movie, the only thing that left an impact was the onerepublic song. secrets. i m hooked to it.
met up with reuben and gang after that at tcc clarke quay to chit chat till they chased us out close to 1am. it was not bad a ketchup session. had to take the nightrider home though. banged my head continuously on the window and seat until everyone behind me was laughing like mad. was dead tired that day. reached home close to 3 and slept till 2 the next day.
slacked at home till at night and went out for inception with ying and gang. brilliant show. no wonder it s movie of the year contender. managed to catch the last train home.
today, suppose to have a table outing but only 5 could go. in the end the 4 of us guys went to taka to walk and wisma to sit at starbucks. ok la, it was still not bad. the place brought back many good memories. and i had espresso frap finally in like 2 years! but that just reminded me how much i ve splurged for the past few days. still gotta pay for things in camp! going broke.
that s about it, gotta book in soon..
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
good week
feeling a lot better over the past week.
actually, i looked back at the previous post and i cant justify what i posted. i cant remember why i was THAT sad or emo. maybe it was the early book in that caused the sian-ess and the feeling was exaggerated. yea i was unhappy about some stuff last week, dun ask me what because i cant put it into words.
anyways, i m happy this week because my effort paid off for ippt. havent ran for about a month and took an ippt. the result was - cannot jump, cannot run. trained hard for the next ippt and retained my gold and ahem some incentives. :D
had a good nights out on wednesday, accompanying my family.
the feeling of going shopping right after booking out on friday is awesome. not so much about the shopping, but just going out to walk, see and feel the world, and with having good company for dinner and just talking. it s nice.
and singing songs on saturday! celebrated huihui s birthday, with her not knowing it, since she ll never agree to it. songs, they facilitate the release of perhaps tension, or unhappiness within and bring fun and laughter when it s sung in a funny way. hahah especially when you cant really sing. laughing at yourself, laughing at your friend or just laughing at laughter. it s pure joy. dinner and had an interesting chat after that. it s seriously becoming a habit man. haha. good fun good company.
and doing stupid things at the garden festival at suntec on sunday with family was somehow becoming quite hard to come by. it was quite tiring to pose at every flower and leaf and cover 2 levels of plants! conked out on the way home. but it was fun to be someone not really yourself around people you know too well. you just do and say stupid things and the reaction will be totally unexpected.
ok i think i shall stop here and go to sleep soon!
till next week, tata.
actually, i looked back at the previous post and i cant justify what i posted. i cant remember why i was THAT sad or emo. maybe it was the early book in that caused the sian-ess and the feeling was exaggerated. yea i was unhappy about some stuff last week, dun ask me what because i cant put it into words.
anyways, i m happy this week because my effort paid off for ippt. havent ran for about a month and took an ippt. the result was - cannot jump, cannot run. trained hard for the next ippt and retained my gold and ahem some incentives. :D
had a good nights out on wednesday, accompanying my family.
the feeling of going shopping right after booking out on friday is awesome. not so much about the shopping, but just going out to walk, see and feel the world, and with having good company for dinner and just talking. it s nice.
and singing songs on saturday! celebrated huihui s birthday, with her not knowing it, since she ll never agree to it. songs, they facilitate the release of perhaps tension, or unhappiness within and bring fun and laughter when it s sung in a funny way. hahah especially when you cant really sing. laughing at yourself, laughing at your friend or just laughing at laughter. it s pure joy. dinner and had an interesting chat after that. it s seriously becoming a habit man. haha. good fun good company.
and doing stupid things at the garden festival at suntec on sunday with family was somehow becoming quite hard to come by. it was quite tiring to pose at every flower and leaf and cover 2 levels of plants! conked out on the way home. but it was fun to be someone not really yourself around people you know too well. you just do and say stupid things and the reaction will be totally unexpected.
ok i think i shall stop here and go to sleep soon!
till next week, tata.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
stress
can you imagine, despite putting in the effort, failure still haunts you, as if it's fate.
can you imagine, every action you make, every word you speak, someone s scrutinizing, waiting to pounce.
can you imagine, living in a world that offers no room for error.
how would you feel?
anyways, i had fish and co and marche this weekend as input, but not much output. that means i m gonna die on wednesday. how to run??
sent sam off at the airport on sat. sincerely hope she does well in aussie!
that s about it.
i don't feel right.
can you imagine, every action you make, every word you speak, someone s scrutinizing, waiting to pounce.
can you imagine, living in a world that offers no room for error.
how would you feel?
anyways, i had fish and co and marche this weekend as input, but not much output. that means i m gonna die on wednesday. how to run??
sent sam off at the airport on sat. sincerely hope she does well in aussie!
that s about it.
i don't feel right.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
thurs, fri, sat, sun
nothing much happened for the rest of the days. but still, the holiday is passable. speaking of holidays, i happen to flip through the forum that day and some mother was complaining about the schools eating up the school holidays. she even threw in the definition of holiday to argue. and if all goes well, i think she ll win. why didnt she start fighting a few years earlier man.
anyways, back to my mundane life. i watched ANOTHER movie on thurs. ip man 3. it wasnt as good as the first 2 but ok, good to watch. i cant believe they reused the same actor for a different role. that s damn cheapskate.
fri. oh it was supposed to be a family day. there was some plans to bbq but in the end NATO. (no action talk only) so we ended up visiting Marina Bay Sands. to be honest, the place is quite impressive. the architecture and the view. it gained some plus points whenever a cool breeze blew, coz it rained that morning. but many shops aint opened yet. all big names. just walked around, checked out the toilet at Paiza, the hotel. yea not bad. haha.
oh there s the YOG park also. they are doing some preparation for the opening ceromony i guess. and just across, they are preparing the road for the F1 coming up. singapore s damn busy.
anyways, we went back to marina square for dinner. so to make up for the failed bbq, we had yuki yaki. it was quite enjoyable for once. started inventing new dishes with whatever was provided. and of course, stomach was filled to the brim. shopped around for furniture and groceries at curry4 after that. it was quite a good day.
saturday. spent the whole day packing my stuff, getting ready to move house. from jurong, to paya lebar. the things are getting more and more. last time it was only BMT stuff. now there s BMT + OCS stuff. then next time, i will have BMT + OCS + AFTC stuff to bring home and to probably chong pang camp.
and i finally went to exercise! damn lazy. swam at safra for about an hour, felt good.
ok i m finally finally finally starting to learn a new skill, procrastinate too much. and IT is fun. but need lots of practise. till next week, tata.
anyways, back to my mundane life. i watched ANOTHER movie on thurs. ip man 3. it wasnt as good as the first 2 but ok, good to watch. i cant believe they reused the same actor for a different role. that s damn cheapskate.
fri. oh it was supposed to be a family day. there was some plans to bbq but in the end NATO. (no action talk only) so we ended up visiting Marina Bay Sands. to be honest, the place is quite impressive. the architecture and the view. it gained some plus points whenever a cool breeze blew, coz it rained that morning. but many shops aint opened yet. all big names. just walked around, checked out the toilet at Paiza, the hotel. yea not bad. haha.
oh there s the YOG park also. they are doing some preparation for the opening ceromony i guess. and just across, they are preparing the road for the F1 coming up. singapore s damn busy.
anyways, we went back to marina square for dinner. so to make up for the failed bbq, we had yuki yaki. it was quite enjoyable for once. started inventing new dishes with whatever was provided. and of course, stomach was filled to the brim. shopped around for furniture and groceries at curry4 after that. it was quite a good day.
saturday. spent the whole day packing my stuff, getting ready to move house. from jurong, to paya lebar. the things are getting more and more. last time it was only BMT stuff. now there s BMT + OCS stuff. then next time, i will have BMT + OCS + AFTC stuff to bring home and to probably chong pang camp.
and i finally went to exercise! damn lazy. swam at safra for about an hour, felt good.
ok i m finally finally finally starting to learn a new skill, procrastinate too much. and IT is fun. but need lots of practise. till next week, tata.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
an almost perfect day
who cares about monday and tuesday when you ve got wednesday!
seriously, i cant remember what happened on monday and tuesday if you ask me now. yea, right now. ok lemme think.
oooo kkk.
monday. met up with huihui at changi international airport for mcdonald s breakfast at 10plus. then sam joined. and gabriel joined. then logs joined from a silkair plane. so the mainpoint was my SPINACH, which never came. instead, we had chicken and very nice mash potatoes and fries. quite a worthy trade. yep so anw, babarella came back with lots of mosquito bites which was kinda expected, slightly worse than coming back from pulau ubin aka the mosquito and sanflies breeding island. after much scratching, we packed her in a taxi and splitted up.
met up with family at a really weird place. farrer park city square. never been there before. but it s really nice and spacious with big name shops that sadly no one frequents. it would be a good hangout to be honest. had pizza for dinner and i actually bought a pair of jeans. it s like a miracle. a new piece of clothing that doesnt originate from SAF hanging in my closet in this period. wow.
tuesday. oh. aunt treated swensons and haagen daz. i was stuffed. should seriously start exercising man.
wednesday. aha. brilliant day. the reason why i m typing at this time, because i dun wanna forget this feeling and exactly what i thought.
collected certs back in sa. felt a little nostalgia. ok not that i had a lot of happy memories in school, but when i saw the pitch, i recalled how i was strutting during the track + sc vs teachers match. how the sun was setting at that moment, giving the oranje hue. and the red track that i ran like a dog 3 times a week. check the ground and you can find my sweat still there. the blue basketball court, the place we played our class captain ball. the canteen where i gobbled my favourite chicken rice and BANANA MILK. aww. the lecture theatres. damn, i kinda miss the bio lectures. the cc where i slept like crazy. hahaha. oh the TOILET! where i spend much of the time standing in front of the fan because it s only fan that can be fixed!
haiya, but you go back, think of all the great times, only to receive something that doesnt make you feel great. i dunno how to put it. but unfortunately, even if i turn back time 1 year ago, i would still do the same, because i ve done my best in the time i had. j1 killed everything. that s the reason why i keep telling my juniors to go study whenever i see them. especially ryan. i must save private ryan!
back to reality. and some fun. we migrated to marina square kbox to relive an illegal session 2 years ago, about the same time. it was fun. even though i cant sing. i managed to make some noises that some how resembled some music, i hope. hah! yea gotta agree with gay, it was abit too short.
travelled back to tampines to watch TWO movies in a row at gv with aunt and sis. TOY STORY 3. the front was kinda slow, but everything fell nicely in the end. it s worthy of probably a 4.5 star. there was this particular scene when the boy finally decided to give away his toys. and i had to hold back some tears then - because i understood how he felt. i can decide to act MAN and laugh it off but learning to confront the feeling requires some real courage. it s about how you become attached to the items that helped you grow up, spend your precious childhood, and how you finally outgrow them. we were all kids. we played with toys, ran around the house like no one s business, role played and rolled all over the floor, and i have to say i had fun doing those lame stuff and i loved my toys. it was the only time of carefree and letting loose.
there was this point the boy made that struck me: the toys, they will always be there for you.
it s not all about the toys. it s about how WE should be like the toys, how we should be there for one another in times of need and be the pillar or crying shoulder for the people around you. especially since now we (ok maybe just me) i dun talk to toys anymore, i talk to people. i dunno about you, but i had a reasonably good childhood, so i felt it.
next up was KARATE KID. 2 hour 20 min. worth it. a good ending, but it was all expected. perhaps the way the good guy won was eye catching, and that s why it s good. hahah but it kinda got me a little hyped up to do some BCCT aka basic close combat training. i was looking forward to Intermediate CCT in army ocs but now... air force. nope. anyway the movie was cool.
yep that s it. a day of entertainment. brilliant day. this is block leave. :D
seriously, i cant remember what happened on monday and tuesday if you ask me now. yea, right now. ok lemme think.
oooo kkk.
monday. met up with huihui at changi international airport for mcdonald s breakfast at 10plus. then sam joined. and gabriel joined. then logs joined from a silkair plane. so the mainpoint was my SPINACH, which never came. instead, we had chicken and very nice mash potatoes and fries. quite a worthy trade. yep so anw, babarella came back with lots of mosquito bites which was kinda expected, slightly worse than coming back from pulau ubin aka the mosquito and sanflies breeding island. after much scratching, we packed her in a taxi and splitted up.
met up with family at a really weird place. farrer park city square. never been there before. but it s really nice and spacious with big name shops that sadly no one frequents. it would be a good hangout to be honest. had pizza for dinner and i actually bought a pair of jeans. it s like a miracle. a new piece of clothing that doesnt originate from SAF hanging in my closet in this period. wow.
tuesday. oh. aunt treated swensons and haagen daz. i was stuffed. should seriously start exercising man.
wednesday. aha. brilliant day. the reason why i m typing at this time, because i dun wanna forget this feeling and exactly what i thought.
collected certs back in sa. felt a little nostalgia. ok not that i had a lot of happy memories in school, but when i saw the pitch, i recalled how i was strutting during the track + sc vs teachers match. how the sun was setting at that moment, giving the oranje hue. and the red track that i ran like a dog 3 times a week. check the ground and you can find my sweat still there. the blue basketball court, the place we played our class captain ball. the canteen where i gobbled my favourite chicken rice and BANANA MILK. aww. the lecture theatres. damn, i kinda miss the bio lectures. the cc where i slept like crazy. hahaha. oh the TOILET! where i spend much of the time standing in front of the fan because it s only fan that can be fixed!
haiya, but you go back, think of all the great times, only to receive something that doesnt make you feel great. i dunno how to put it. but unfortunately, even if i turn back time 1 year ago, i would still do the same, because i ve done my best in the time i had. j1 killed everything. that s the reason why i keep telling my juniors to go study whenever i see them. especially ryan. i must save private ryan!
back to reality. and some fun. we migrated to marina square kbox to relive an illegal session 2 years ago, about the same time. it was fun. even though i cant sing. i managed to make some noises that some how resembled some music, i hope. hah! yea gotta agree with gay, it was abit too short.
travelled back to tampines to watch TWO movies in a row at gv with aunt and sis. TOY STORY 3. the front was kinda slow, but everything fell nicely in the end. it s worthy of probably a 4.5 star. there was this particular scene when the boy finally decided to give away his toys. and i had to hold back some tears then - because i understood how he felt. i can decide to act MAN and laugh it off but learning to confront the feeling requires some real courage. it s about how you become attached to the items that helped you grow up, spend your precious childhood, and how you finally outgrow them. we were all kids. we played with toys, ran around the house like no one s business, role played and rolled all over the floor, and i have to say i had fun doing those lame stuff and i loved my toys. it was the only time of carefree and letting loose.
there was this point the boy made that struck me: the toys, they will always be there for you.
it s not all about the toys. it s about how WE should be like the toys, how we should be there for one another in times of need and be the pillar or crying shoulder for the people around you. especially since now we (ok maybe just me) i dun talk to toys anymore, i talk to people. i dunno about you, but i had a reasonably good childhood, so i felt it.
next up was KARATE KID. 2 hour 20 min. worth it. a good ending, but it was all expected. perhaps the way the good guy won was eye catching, and that s why it s good. hahah but it kinda got me a little hyped up to do some BCCT aka basic close combat training. i was looking forward to Intermediate CCT in army ocs but now... air force. nope. anyway the movie was cool.
yep that s it. a day of entertainment. brilliant day. this is block leave. :D
Sunday, June 20, 2010
a chapter concluded.
there goes another phase. i ve completed somewhat, another bmt.
here s the breakdown:
6 feb 10 +
9 weeks bmt in tekong
1 week block leave
19 april 10 +
2 weeks clm in safti ocs
7 weeks afst in safti ocs
1 week block leave
soon to come:
28 june 10 +
26 weeks afpt in aftc
3 weeks joint term in safti ocs
= COMMISSIONING
ok, that s being positive, and STILL assuming, my knee doesnt give way, i dun do stupid things, and i dun have baygon sprayed all over me.
looking back, it has been 20 weeks in NS! that s an astonishing approximate 5 months. i dunno whether i can declare "time flew" because it didnt quite fly by THAT quickly. it required some amount of praying that the day ends faster, some gritting of the teeth, some trembling of the limbs and quite a significant amount of merrymaking. hahaha. it has been significant.
the last week in safti was er... erm... not so challenging. social night on friday and it was okay. rounded up the term with the closer friends i made in afst, which werent that many, but i m prepared to form some covalent bonds with the gbad guys.
all i m doing now is slacking. so, ask me out next week, before i start to rot at home!
enjoy life people!
here s the breakdown:
6 feb 10 +
9 weeks bmt in tekong
1 week block leave
19 april 10 +
2 weeks clm in safti ocs
7 weeks afst in safti ocs
1 week block leave
soon to come:
28 june 10 +
26 weeks afpt in aftc
3 weeks joint term in safti ocs
= COMMISSIONING
ok, that s being positive, and STILL assuming, my knee doesnt give way, i dun do stupid things, and i dun have baygon sprayed all over me.
looking back, it has been 20 weeks in NS! that s an astonishing approximate 5 months. i dunno whether i can declare "time flew" because it didnt quite fly by THAT quickly. it required some amount of praying that the day ends faster, some gritting of the teeth, some trembling of the limbs and quite a significant amount of merrymaking. hahaha. it has been significant.
the last week in safti was er... erm... not so challenging. social night on friday and it was okay. rounded up the term with the closer friends i made in afst, which werent that many, but i m prepared to form some covalent bonds with the gbad guys.
all i m doing now is slacking. so, ask me out next week, before i start to rot at home!
enjoy life people!
Sunday, June 13, 2010
a real weekend. for once.
thanks all for the birthday wishes! appreciate every single one of them.
one year older now. and i guess i m on the steeper part of the exponential learning curve. been gaining some vital life lessons for the past year. chionging hard for A s, chionging hard for the soccer ball, chionging up the hill with my rifle and my buddy. basically chionging. learnt a lot for the 4 months in NS now. mainly learning to be independent, dealing with people of different social backgrounds and sucking my thumb. real hard.
worked hard during the weekdays and had a well deserved break over the weekend. booked out on friday after scrubbing the toilet bowl as usual, and had a boomz buffet dinner at The Line, Shangri la, with the first match of the 2010 FIFA World Cup screening while i chomp away in a brilliant setting. That s life man.
And i had a nice undisrupted sleep on my comfortable bed with the air con blowing that night. When i woke up, i had no homework! Spent the whole day storming down orchard area. i had a good time actually. even though it was quite tiring.
sunday was just as good. nice sleep, good family breakfast and lunch, then had a karaoke session with the guitar and piano, laughed at Babarela on xinmsn and packed up to head to jurong for sakae dinner. and finally here i am, contented with a full stomach, mentally recharged, physically rested, ready to sprint the last stretch, the last week in safti.
life, oh life.
one year older now. and i guess i m on the steeper part of the exponential learning curve. been gaining some vital life lessons for the past year. chionging hard for A s, chionging hard for the soccer ball, chionging up the hill with my rifle and my buddy. basically chionging. learnt a lot for the 4 months in NS now. mainly learning to be independent, dealing with people of different social backgrounds and sucking my thumb. real hard.
worked hard during the weekdays and had a well deserved break over the weekend. booked out on friday after scrubbing the toilet bowl as usual, and had a boomz buffet dinner at The Line, Shangri la, with the first match of the 2010 FIFA World Cup screening while i chomp away in a brilliant setting. That s life man.
And i had a nice undisrupted sleep on my comfortable bed with the air con blowing that night. When i woke up, i had no homework! Spent the whole day storming down orchard area. i had a good time actually. even though it was quite tiring.
sunday was just as good. nice sleep, good family breakfast and lunch, then had a karaoke session with the guitar and piano, laughed at Babarela on xinmsn and packed up to head to jurong for sakae dinner. and finally here i am, contented with a full stomach, mentally recharged, physically rested, ready to sprint the last stretch, the last week in safti.
life, oh life.
Sunday, June 06, 2010
all alone
i have been typing for the whole day now, so i think i shall keep this short to spare my eyes from further damage done by the computer monitor.
the past week seemed damn long.
my buddy left. we had a long heart to heart talk on the last night and i realised the best thing that happened to me since the start of air force service term was to have him as a room mate. we are somewhat similar in many ways, the only difference lies in that he has a hell lot more life experience and made decisions that i have to make soon. being at the cross roads of life, it is fortunate for me to have some valuable advice thrown down by a senior. it was a good night.
i met another good fella on friday. he was another senior. and the tips and preview he gave gave me some mental preparation for what to come. it isnt gonna be easy but still it wouldnt be as depressing as what the army guys are going through. they seem so... sad. even if they dun manage to pull through, they have already earned my respect. just compare to some others.. i can only sigh.
celebrated my birthday which still has a countdown on everyday s newspapers (there is only one countdown at the moment) on saturday with gay, ape and 2 nineteen year olds. haha we are really running out of ideas. but it was something new in a way. i was dead tired yesterday so pardon my lethargy and sianess. thanks peeps for everything.
the PROJECT. chionged till 3am yesterday but i still couldnt complete. fell asleep while doing it. seriously exhausted. finally completed it about an hour ago.
checked my knee. it should be fine. i just need to do a Jamie Carragher for the moment. Capello just have to come at the right moment.
i still havent found a solution to the problem for next friday. and i have to find soon. real soon.
everyday, there s this feeling. i cant really describe. it s a mixture of wanting to cry, wanting to shout, wanting to grab something but there s nothing to grab, wanting to swallow something sweet but the taste s only sour. It s just so damn complex is frustrating.
just sigh.
the past week seemed damn long.
my buddy left. we had a long heart to heart talk on the last night and i realised the best thing that happened to me since the start of air force service term was to have him as a room mate. we are somewhat similar in many ways, the only difference lies in that he has a hell lot more life experience and made decisions that i have to make soon. being at the cross roads of life, it is fortunate for me to have some valuable advice thrown down by a senior. it was a good night.
i met another good fella on friday. he was another senior. and the tips and preview he gave gave me some mental preparation for what to come. it isnt gonna be easy but still it wouldnt be as depressing as what the army guys are going through. they seem so... sad. even if they dun manage to pull through, they have already earned my respect. just compare to some others.. i can only sigh.
celebrated my birthday which still has a countdown on everyday s newspapers (there is only one countdown at the moment) on saturday with gay, ape and 2 nineteen year olds. haha we are really running out of ideas. but it was something new in a way. i was dead tired yesterday so pardon my lethargy and sianess. thanks peeps for everything.
the PROJECT. chionged till 3am yesterday but i still couldnt complete. fell asleep while doing it. seriously exhausted. finally completed it about an hour ago.
checked my knee. it should be fine. i just need to do a Jamie Carragher for the moment. Capello just have to come at the right moment.
i still havent found a solution to the problem for next friday. and i have to find soon. real soon.
everyday, there s this feeling. i cant really describe. it s a mixture of wanting to cry, wanting to shout, wanting to grab something but there s nothing to grab, wanting to swallow something sweet but the taste s only sour. It s just so damn complex is frustrating.
just sigh.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Pitstop
Short book out. Had fun yesterday at Pitstop, Clarke Quay to celebrate logs birthday. Havent felt so let loose and liberal for a long time now. I simply enjoyed the session. Nothing else to say but looking forward to the long weekend! It's quite a physically demanding week coming up but..
let's go!
let's go!
Sunday, May 16, 2010
week 4 and counting
i was back at pulau ubin for three days to donate blood. it was a tiring continuous session. but nothing compared to what my friends in green are going through, or gonna go through. anyways, i gotta make some plans soon. everyone else is.
finally had a decent weekend. went to town yesterday to meet friends. caught FeMan II at the Cathay with yinglun, jeremy + gf, and reuben. had a brilliant ketchup session with them. after ying lun s sharing, i m grateful for what i m given. not taking anything for granted.
that s about it i guess. oh yea, visited the doc just now to get some medicine. no way i m gonna miss lectures. it s like back to studying all over again.
life s good.
thank you.
hope everyone else s doing fine.
let s goooo! another week!
finally had a decent weekend. went to town yesterday to meet friends. caught FeMan II at the Cathay with yinglun, jeremy + gf, and reuben. had a brilliant ketchup session with them. after ying lun s sharing, i m grateful for what i m given. not taking anything for granted.
that s about it i guess. oh yea, visited the doc just now to get some medicine. no way i m gonna miss lectures. it s like back to studying all over again.
life s good.
thank you.
hope everyone else s doing fine.
let s goooo! another week!
Saturday, May 08, 2010
chapter II
hello world. i survived 3 weeks.
i cant say much about what went on for the past 3 weeks. but i can say that i m no more green. but now blue. ok maybe i m still partially green in some sense, but i m officially and technically blue from now onwards.
i m halting here for a while.
because i have to think before typing.
ok.
learnt quite a bit so far. missed life on the outside, missed people, thought about stuff and went through some tough times. both physically and mentally. but more of mental. for once, i had to pause, take out a book and a pen, list out problems and come up with solutions. and everyday i attempt to apply them.
it s a new dimension of challenge. trapped within a boundary of unfamiliar scenarios, feeling uncomfortable. but it s a stage of becoming independent and facing the real world. the artificial environment created for me since i was born has finally collapsed. there s no longer maternal wings to hide beneath, no longer filtering walls of separation, no longer shields of steel to take the blows. i stand alone.
a new chapter has begun.
but you'll never walk alone.
i cant say much about what went on for the past 3 weeks. but i can say that i m no more green. but now blue. ok maybe i m still partially green in some sense, but i m officially and technically blue from now onwards.
i m halting here for a while.
because i have to think before typing.
ok.
learnt quite a bit so far. missed life on the outside, missed people, thought about stuff and went through some tough times. both physically and mentally. but more of mental. for once, i had to pause, take out a book and a pen, list out problems and come up with solutions. and everyday i attempt to apply them.
it s a new dimension of challenge. trapped within a boundary of unfamiliar scenarios, feeling uncomfortable. but it s a stage of becoming independent and facing the real world. the artificial environment created for me since i was born has finally collapsed. there s no longer maternal wings to hide beneath, no longer filtering walls of separation, no longer shields of steel to take the blows. i stand alone.
a new chapter has begun.
but you'll never walk alone.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
a new journey
and so... that s the end of block leave. just a wink of the eye. all i did was - slack.
friday was posting results day. and i got ocs. feelings? excited perhaps. glad that i ve been given a chance to do something right for once. i guess i should be fine if i dun come back here and announce my right knee gave way, or my back broke or i sprained both ankles for the 4073288th time. short term goal - get through 3 weeks confinement.
class dinner at handburger that night. comforting to see most of the class doing ok and good to catch up with some of them. had an aptitude test the next morning, wont expect much in return.
sat, supposedly a clique outing, lunch at jack s at marina and then kick ass movie. funny show but i was more obsessed with the salted popcorn. hahaha. havent tasted it for a long long long time. sorry peeps if i hogged it for too long!
haha caught this on the way home on friday night. the boy was really adorable. he was sitting there holding his sketchbook and colour pencils, wanting to close his eyes, but still looking around, then closed gradually, then opened and look around before finally closing in peace. the innocence is priceless. i never remembered being that tired to be able to fall asleep sitting on the floor after probably an art class? and when the train reached their stop, the mom stood up and just walked to the door before realising her boy was still there. she called out softly and he jumped awake, rubbing his eyes and without a word of complain or reluctance, he duly followed his mom.
should i say maturity at such a young age?
up to you to guage.
sunday. last day out. settled the stuff left and had a last meal with family. ok getting tired now, going to sleeeeeeeppp!
cya in 3 weeks time. i hope. :)
ok put in a positive way, it s called resting and recuperating. but, it wasnt 100% recuperating. in fact i made life even more difficult for myself. had cage on thursday with section and slayers. and yep, in the midst of a heroic block, i sprained my right ankle yet again. at least it s a lot better now.
had lunch with slayers at kallang and then went for a rather nice relaxing stroll around the shopping malls in tampines alone. ok it wasnt a stroll because i was hobbling about, but still it was just a period of solitude and peace. went to times for some glancing of books and hobbled home for dinner.
friday was posting results day. and i got ocs. feelings? excited perhaps. glad that i ve been given a chance to do something right for once. i guess i should be fine if i dun come back here and announce my right knee gave way, or my back broke or i sprained both ankles for the 4073288th time. short term goal - get through 3 weeks confinement.
class dinner at handburger that night. comforting to see most of the class doing ok and good to catch up with some of them. had an aptitude test the next morning, wont expect much in return.
sat, supposedly a clique outing, lunch at jack s at marina and then kick ass movie. funny show but i was more obsessed with the salted popcorn. hahaha. havent tasted it for a long long long time. sorry peeps if i hogged it for too long!
haha caught this on the way home on friday night. the boy was really adorable. he was sitting there holding his sketchbook and colour pencils, wanting to close his eyes, but still looking around, then closed gradually, then opened and look around before finally closing in peace. the innocence is priceless. i never remembered being that tired to be able to fall asleep sitting on the floor after probably an art class? and when the train reached their stop, the mom stood up and just walked to the door before realising her boy was still there. she called out softly and he jumped awake, rubbing his eyes and without a word of complain or reluctance, he duly followed his mom.
should i say maturity at such a young age?
up to you to guage.
sunday. last day out. settled the stuff left and had a last meal with family. ok getting tired now, going to sleeeeeeeppp!
cya in 3 weeks time. i hope. :)
i'm officially missing you.
.. as always.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
pop
hmm so my bmt journey ended last friday. but honestly speaking, i dun feel like i have accomplished something great. no, not that bmt wasnt tough. in fact it was quite tough. it s just that i think there are much worse torturing to face and overcome, and this is just a miniature step. 1 year 8 months more. that s 20 more months to go.
ok ok let s be a liiiiiilllllltttttttllleee bit more cheerful. i completed 24km route march. that s a WOW factor. it was quite bad at that time. but looking back, it s not that bad. apart from the after effects of the march, which includes a migraine on the right side of my head, burning temperature, heat rashes, abrasions, blisters, back aches, and fatigue, it isnt that bad. i havent collapsed yet, which means, my mind was still in control, which means i could still walk further!
yea call me nuts.
anyways, block leave has been pretty much quite boring. slept my whole saturday away, ok throw in a bit of mahjong. then chalet on sunday with section 2. rundown place but spacious and it was quite a good gathering overall. blasted the place with my amp, someone brought a ps2, the bbq was not bad, there was drunk action and we had some sleep. so, everything was pretty much in place. really proud to find a diamond in the section. self sacrificial, organised, loyal, funny and a gentleman. rare rare rare. i hardly had to do anything for once at all. thanks marcus.
tue, accompanied mom to hospital for operation. everything s well. wed, met ying lun and went for nationals at cck stadium. sa did well. fantastic job. then had a mad rush hour with ying lun and nic kang since the commando was going to be late for book in. 30 buck cab ride. thrilling.
one thing i wanted to type about for quite some time. i just dun geddit. what do people actually see? seriously. virtues? or they just cant see them? or they ignore them? or they interpret them so damn differently? i really have no clue. what s wrong with the world?
read a book, read between the lines, see behind the words, get the basis, get to what the hell the book is about. see something good, like it. see something bad, hate it. simple as that. why are there people who read incorrigible books and still love them? what do they see in such a book? are there no distinct universal catergories for good and bad?
ok ok let s be a liiiiiilllllltttttttllleee bit more cheerful. i completed 24km route march. that s a WOW factor. it was quite bad at that time. but looking back, it s not that bad. apart from the after effects of the march, which includes a migraine on the right side of my head, burning temperature, heat rashes, abrasions, blisters, back aches, and fatigue, it isnt that bad. i havent collapsed yet, which means, my mind was still in control, which means i could still walk further!
yea call me nuts.
anyways, block leave has been pretty much quite boring. slept my whole saturday away, ok throw in a bit of mahjong. then chalet on sunday with section 2. rundown place but spacious and it was quite a good gathering overall. blasted the place with my amp, someone brought a ps2, the bbq was not bad, there was drunk action and we had some sleep. so, everything was pretty much in place. really proud to find a diamond in the section. self sacrificial, organised, loyal, funny and a gentleman. rare rare rare. i hardly had to do anything for once at all. thanks marcus.
tue, accompanied mom to hospital for operation. everything s well. wed, met ying lun and went for nationals at cck stadium. sa did well. fantastic job. then had a mad rush hour with ying lun and nic kang since the commando was going to be late for book in. 30 buck cab ride. thrilling.
one thing i wanted to type about for quite some time. i just dun geddit. what do people actually see? seriously. virtues? or they just cant see them? or they ignore them? or they interpret them so damn differently? i really have no clue. what s wrong with the world?
read a book, read between the lines, see behind the words, get the basis, get to what the hell the book is about. see something good, like it. see something bad, hate it. simple as that. why are there people who read incorrigible books and still love them? what do they see in such a book? are there no distinct universal catergories for good and bad?
Saturday, April 03, 2010
lights out: zero eight zero zero
hello. didnt have time to update last week and last week seemed a long long time ago, too long for me to even remember what happened. there was swensons with the class thanks to the generous mr tan. oh and i actually booked out on a friday night after a 16 click route march. miracles happen.
haha another miracle happened 2 days back: we were the first to book out, meaning a long weekend. and so we made plans for a good night out as a section on a very Good Friday. met up with slayers for clash of the titans at lido but i had to pang seh them for lan to meet up with p3s2. had this " oh so familiar " feeling when i was with them, sad to miss the lan session. but there will be other times i m sure.
and so, i met marcus and syafiq then lim wee came along at orchard mrt. bussed to zouk and had a hellavu night. if you are imagining me dancing like a mad dog then please halt. party started quite late but it was at most 20 min of high-ness and it was the beginning of a pretty amazing night. shallnt go into details but i was almost moved to tears by someone i see practically almost every day now. the revelations, confessions or simply what came from the bottom of the heart. when the cerebral doesnt control the gate to secrets, or pent up feelings or the stuff in the stomach, literally everything comes out.
last night i witnessed
loyalty
passion
friendship
brotherhood
determination
selflessness and ...
love.
i learnt something. everything you do has an impact on someone else. everything. every single little thing.
and the previous post is justified.
it's not what you leave behind,
but what you are about to gain.
haha another miracle happened 2 days back: we were the first to book out, meaning a long weekend. and so we made plans for a good night out as a section on a very Good Friday. met up with slayers for clash of the titans at lido but i had to pang seh them for lan to meet up with p3s2. had this " oh so familiar " feeling when i was with them, sad to miss the lan session. but there will be other times i m sure.
and so, i met marcus and syafiq then lim wee came along at orchard mrt. bussed to zouk and had a hellavu night. if you are imagining me dancing like a mad dog then please halt. party started quite late but it was at most 20 min of high-ness and it was the beginning of a pretty amazing night. shallnt go into details but i was almost moved to tears by someone i see practically almost every day now. the revelations, confessions or simply what came from the bottom of the heart. when the cerebral doesnt control the gate to secrets, or pent up feelings or the stuff in the stomach, literally everything comes out.
last night i witnessed
loyalty
passion
friendship
brotherhood
determination
selflessness and ...
love.
i learnt something. everything you do has an impact on someone else. everything. every single little thing.
and the previous post is justified.
it's not what you leave behind,
but what you are about to gain.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
the alphabet that ranged from letter A to letter U
hmm i probably had one of the worst week of my life. both mentally and physically. but i guess others had it worse on their bodies. the fever was bad, but the mental torture was badder.
i dun think i displayed any signs of depression or suicidal thoughts though. haha. perhaps, it could be what was predicted or thought as positive and a blessing in disguise. a time offerred to me as a period of reflection, and a duration of confession of what i truly thought about myself. whether anyone else understood was an entire different matter.
but i guess, this is growing up. when you ve gone through real shit, and survived it. you ve grown up. that s life. just accept things, take it into stride and keep moving. there s always a way out. if not, just keep digging under till you find one. there are many other things to look forward to not just those to dwell upon.
let's go!
i dun think i displayed any signs of depression or suicidal thoughts though. haha. perhaps, it could be what was predicted or thought as positive and a blessing in disguise. a time offerred to me as a period of reflection, and a duration of confession of what i truly thought about myself. whether anyone else understood was an entire different matter.
but i guess, this is growing up. when you ve gone through real shit, and survived it. you ve grown up. that s life. just accept things, take it into stride and keep moving. there s always a way out. if not, just keep digging under till you find one. there are many other things to look forward to not just those to dwell upon.
let's go!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
TO THE LIMIT? IT'S BEYOND LIMITS.
LIFE'S GOOD!
i woke up this morning feeling awesome. well it s not that i suddenly went bonkers in order to get this feeling. but when i thought about how life was the day before and i compare it to today, i m just glad.
and yea, i realised i ve been way too dreary. let s start looking on the bright side of life for once.
and weekends, rock. no, actually i m referring to saturday afternoons to sunday evenings. and that s good enough. always better than nothing. :D
be appreciative.
i woke up this morning feeling awesome. well it s not that i suddenly went bonkers in order to get this feeling. but when i thought about how life was the day before and i compare it to today, i m just glad.
and yea, i realised i ve been way too dreary. let s start looking on the bright side of life for once.
and weekends, rock. no, actually i m referring to saturday afternoons to sunday evenings. and that s good enough. always better than nothing. :D
be appreciative.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
a brand new kind of life
i survived. that s about all that i can say. learnt many valuable lessons in the past week, the type that people term as life lessons. but i guess the most important thing i learnt is to not take anything for granted. be thankful, always. be appreciative. be glad that life is good. tomorrow can be worse. or there might well be no tomorrow at all.
should i say i was complacent? or confident?
anyways, put the serious stuff aside. it s time for the festive mood! CNY. reunion dinner today, hardly a reunion at all. just the usual people that appear during weekends. tomorrow should be better, i hope. dun be too confident about it, expect less, anything more will be a surprise. a pleasant one.
kiddos all grown up. and now i m ranked lower than them. it s like taking the prelims for 4 years, and now, i m taking the final examination for 2 years. i can say that, the prelims are way easier than the final exam. but at least, i braced myself for it.
just 8 more times. in the mean time, i have to decide, whether i want more of it. am i up for the challenge? i know now, it definitely is.
valentines day.
i miss japan and bintan.
and a life.
should i say i was complacent? or confident?
anyways, put the serious stuff aside. it s time for the festive mood! CNY. reunion dinner today, hardly a reunion at all. just the usual people that appear during weekends. tomorrow should be better, i hope. dun be too confident about it, expect less, anything more will be a surprise. a pleasant one.
kiddos all grown up. and now i m ranked lower than them. it s like taking the prelims for 4 years, and now, i m taking the final examination for 2 years. i can say that, the prelims are way easier than the final exam. but at least, i braced myself for it.
just 8 more times. in the mean time, i have to decide, whether i want more of it. am i up for the challenge? i know now, it definitely is.
valentines day.
i miss japan and bintan.
and a life.
Saturday, February 06, 2010
TIM
this post is dedicated to Hahn Dong Seok.
because to him, i can only express remorse and regret. if i ever made a promise, i ll stay true to it. i mean my word. BUT, i broke not 1, not 2 but 3 promises i made to tim. i m so ashamed.
so tim, if you still remember (i highly suspect you dun), please forgive me.
the promises were:
ONE : Plan Z. we'll sit by that cambodian beach and watch the sunrise.
TWO: i will organise an all guys outing.
THREE: i m suppose to tell you something when the time is right, because you told me yours.
i fulfilled none. i suppose i can make amends by changing the beach to the one at ECP or pasir ris park. the poker nights should make up for 2. and 3, i ll say, the time aint right. or maybe it was, you know, but you missed the auspicious hour. anyway, sorry dude.
going in tomorrow. completed tasks like going to chinatown for the festive mood, done with all the cleaning, installing football frenzy, and a good dinner with the 5. alright that s about it. bring on the new challenge! if it even is.
negative, over.
because to him, i can only express remorse and regret. if i ever made a promise, i ll stay true to it. i mean my word. BUT, i broke not 1, not 2 but 3 promises i made to tim. i m so ashamed.
so tim, if you still remember (i highly suspect you dun), please forgive me.
the promises were:
ONE : Plan Z. we'll sit by that cambodian beach and watch the sunrise.
TWO: i will organise an all guys outing.
THREE: i m suppose to tell you something when the time is right, because you told me yours.
i fulfilled none. i suppose i can make amends by changing the beach to the one at ECP or pasir ris park. the poker nights should make up for 2. and 3, i ll say, the time aint right. or maybe it was, you know, but you missed the auspicious hour. anyway, sorry dude.
going in tomorrow. completed tasks like going to chinatown for the festive mood, done with all the cleaning, installing football frenzy, and a good dinner with the 5. alright that s about it. bring on the new challenge! if it even is.
negative, over.
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