Sunday, January 09, 2011
dropping rain
however, i'm extremely worried. i have been on the verge of falling ill since wednesday. the feeling and the symptoms. the bad throat and the occasional sneeze hint at something. if i do fall, and miss the rehearsals, that's it. there goes the event i've been looking forward to for 9 months. and so, i've been popping actifed, panadol, danzen and downing expectorant ever since. i'm not sure how these medications work, but i'm hoping that they will somehow disrupt the replication process and prevent the virus from infecting my dear cells. i have to recover by tomorrow!!!
please please please.
despite feeling shitty, i still went for my first acca lesson during the friday nights out. it was a mad rush and i only managed to attend half of it, but i think it's worth it. i learnt a lot in the hour plus. but the most crucial lesson learnt is: there is a hell lot of things out there i don't know. and that reminded me i'm no where, nobody. i have to work hard.
the next day i received news that i might not be staring at stores or vehicles afterall. instead, i'll be in charge of almost 30 men. it's kinda weird. but i guess, this is what we are trained for ultimately right. to lead, to excel, to overcome. it's time to take charge, make the decisions, instruct, do the right thing. i've learnt to take care of myself, and now, it's time to take care of others. the bar gives authority i've never dreamt of. but with great power, comes great responsibility.
had driving straight after a saturday bookout and it was good. getting used to the controls pretty well. it was my younger sister's birthday and we went to tung lok at east coast for dinner. it was extremely fulfilling since it was an ala carte buffet. the food was good and so was the environment.
everyone's growing old. i found it hard to believe that she's 17 already. and me, i'm gonna be 20. TWO ZERO. not a teen anymore. it's like, wow. 2 decades just passed like that. i'd better get things done, instead of always waiting and waiting and waiting. sometimes, certain things can't wait. and once you miss it, you can never get it back.
youth is one, no doubt.
Friday, December 31, 2010
2010 annual report
It’s the last day of the year and so, here’s an annual end of the year ‘reflection’ again! Ok, it’s more of a summary of what happened this year, as usual. I had the idea of uploading photos to mark certain significant events, but I’m too lazy to do so and I’m kinda in a rush to get out of the house. So, here it goes, a quick one I hope.
I kick started the year with an outrageous trip to Bintan, aka the Scam Island. The nasi goreng was ultimate hilarious. I really enjoyed the trip. Just a bunch of guys, childish, yet matured enough to take care of themselves, and their brothers in arms. Somehow, i hope i can go on another trip with them. We might have changed a significant lot by the end of this year, but i think the core, the character of the person will never change. If he is funny, he is funny. If he is a leader, he will always be one. And 4 of those who went are deemed leaders of this country. These are the people i can trust my life with.
And after enough fooling around in scam island, i resided in another island for 9 weeks. The island of pulau tekong. It was tough, tougher than i thought, but i survived it and was elated during the Passing out Parade. Honoured to be in the drill squad, which came in 2nd, and as such, was in the front row of the parade. It wasn’t grand, but i guess it’s enough to mark this significant milestone of my life. Loved my section, and i’m sure my section loved me. They thought so highly of me, and i think they are the ones who got me a ticket to a ride of my lifetime. And so, i was posted to Officer Cadet School after the pop. I was all geared up and ready for the tough infantry training, the jungle confidence course in brunei, the unlimted route marches, the crazy field camps and tough mental challenges to go through. I was posted to an unusual Wing. Sierra. There were a billion regulars, mostly air force and navy sign ons. And i was kinda out of place. The 3 weeks there was quite ok, just getting used to life in Safti. However, i was tempted to sign on. I thought hard about my future during those 3 weeks, after the a level results were released. There was sort of a plan. But i consulted my parents and they said, ‘wait, don’t be hasty.’ I guess those were the wisest words i heard for a long time. I was young and naive, easily influenced, and didn’t know i was playing with probably my whole life. So i thought, yea, ok i shall listen. We’ll wait. And i waited.
On the last day in Sierra, i received the news that i was going to Air Wing. The plane has come to save my soul from torture. I was jumping for joy and telling the whole world the news. I was one lucky idiot out of how many others to be able to go to Ground Based Air Defence. And so i served my service term of 7 weeks in Air Wing OCS. I met a 26 year old uncle who talked sense and gave me precious advice. He ‘s a Mechanical Engineering grad of NTU and told me about his life, his decisions, his WRONG decisions, his regrets and mistakes. He didn’t want me to make the same mistakes and we spent one whole night talking. I probably grew 3 years older after the session. He left the Wing early since he was a non combatant and required 2 weeks less training. So i lived alone in my room for 2 weeks, settling unconventional stuff like getting a Social Night date and figuring out what to wear that won’t get me confined. The 7 weeks was bad enough with politics and stuff, i didn’t want any more crap. I realised I had so few female friends to ask and even had to turn to my motherly ‘sister’ for help. That was how desperate i was when the date drew near. And so, that s how i met a saviour in xunqi to help me out. The build up to the event was kinda hectic, but i guess everything paid off. It was expensive, but somehow worth it. Part of officership training is handling this kind of events, knowing what to do, and of course, having fun ultimately. And perhaps, it’s training to grow up, be a gentleman, and make more female friends before i start seeing guys as attractive. Social Night was a significant day of 2010.
After the 7 weeks in Safti, i left for Air Force Training Command in Paya Lebar. I can’t disclose much about training, but all i can say is that it’s tough in some ways, relax in others. 26 weeks. It wasn’t easy. But yet i pulled through again. Yes, without my knees giving way or me doing stupid things. It was a rather smooth sailing 6 months. I made a bunch of great buddies, who i believe, will be of definite help to me in future. As they call us – the scholar batch. All except me of course. The RSAF Combined Graduation Ceremony went all well, i received the sword all officers receive, got my wings to signify the Air Warfare Officer vocation, wore the No.2 ‘suit’ for the fine dining. And after all that training, i’m back in Safti, rehearsing for the finale. The commissioning parade on 15 January 2011.
That was about the entire NS life i had so far.
In between, i started to learn driving, manual, and will be taking the test on 1st March 2011. I also decided to diversify my qualifications and signed up for ACCA, of which night lessons begin next week so that i can fully utilize my time now. I guess this should be the path i’m taking afterall. Yup, it was a great year of ups and downs (as always) and this is the year i learnt the most life skills. Skills like living independently, which i m kinda loving it, social skills, time management (which still needs brushing up), DECISIVENESS which improved a lot and perhaps brotherhood..
This is the stage where i grow up, choose my path, pave it, and work towards it. I shall end this post with what i dreamt last night. It’s significant i guess, the last dream of 2010. And it woke me up at 4am, and i couldn’t sleep anymore. The details are kinda difficult to type out, but i think i can draw one conclusion from it. I think i’ve decided i should know someone better.
That’s it, folks. I don’t really like to set resolutions, so i shall keep it that way. Come what may, 2011!!
Friday, December 24, 2010
a mini holiday
ok anyway, back to the chalet, had a fulfilling bbq without prawns, and we went for late night bowling till 1am. slept for a while before booking in. skip the boring parts. ok went back to the chalet after book out and had a simple dinner at the food court. played some mahjong before hitting the sacks earlier. went back to aftc for the last time to move our stuff to safti once more. i ll miss the place. it has been a brilliant 6 months spent at paya lebar. life was good. i m one lucky fella to be posted there for training, and to have spent it with great people and inspiring leaders.
safti. sweet old safti. memories rushed back the moment we hit the gates. i m sure i ll be black by the end of 3 weeks. evident by some sun burn after just one drill session. it s quite fun though. booked out early and met lois for movie at jp since it s her territory. i would say it s worth the money. quite a good movie.
driving today, and i mastered the highest level of the art of solitude by strolling down town all by myself. just walked and walked around orchard, mingling within the crowds, observing the changes, soaking the christmas atmosphere and just people watched. of course it would have been nice to have friends there, but i just didnt know who to ask. and so, i just had dinner and went back. it s not that sad as it seems. it s just a phase of life, where you just think.. and that s all you can do.
Monday, December 20, 2010
sword for life, wings to fly.
it was apparently quite a big event, considering the number of HEADS who actually bothered to attend. i was pretty amused. yep anyway i have to admit everything went very well and the organisation was really good. i received my sword at last! not to forget, the wings too! after the 26 weeks of training, it finally ended with this to mark it. but somehow i didnt really feel that ecstatic. it s like, oh ok, yea it s here. perhaps the build up to this wasnt that intense. we had so much freedom, so much time out, and even stay out. i guess this just shows how much these things are compared to time spent with my family and friends. however, i could see how proud my parents were when i received the sword. they must be thinking, yea this fella finally got something right after getting everything else wrong for 19 years. hahah. anyways, after the ceromony was fine dining which was labelled 'uncomfortable dining' by the guy sitting beside me. i m fine with fine dining. i m fine as long as the food is nice. and damn, it was great. soup was creamy, appetiser appetising, bread free flow, tenderloin brilliantly tender and pan fried. even the spirit was well mixed, ok minus the pot wine, everything was great. after the formal stuff, there was some sabo game which i shallnt disclose anything here.
sat morning was cage! played pretty well and that s all that matters since my main dudes were mostly missing. it s so difficult to organise when everyone s schedule clashes. lunch at koufu leisure park and then went for lesson and home. sun, i finally cleared up my army stuff. and played mahjong which i technically won $120, but the new rule was to divide by 10. so, i won 12 bucks. great. squeezed in time to watch despicable me on mio. yep it was quite good, but kinda like ratatouile. too similar plot.
today, i m at home thanks to the need to clear leave. and i dedicated my entire day to family. which was kinda weird. because, i ended up going to karaoke with them. hahaha. and it s not teo heng or kbox. it s civil service club! tried to get teo heng but no space, tried kbox but too ex. the club was pathetic, but cheap! $7 per hour for a room that can hold 10 people. just that it s like some nightclub type except that it s all the uncles and aunties trying to practise for Golden Hour (is that the ch8 programme?) or is it golden years. ah whatever. it s quite hilarious. teo heng s still cheaper though, since they stupidly forced us to order $3 cokes and $5 fruits. went for dinner at some tim sum place around farrer park. quite fulfilling. ok i guess thats it. MORE family time tml, at the chalet. till then, tata!
Monday, December 13, 2010
packed like sardines
Sunday, December 05, 2010
social creatures
Monday, November 29, 2010
it ain't over yet
Sunday, November 21, 2010
sweet freedom
put it in nicer terms it s called rest and recovery, or as some of my friends would say, body maintenance. hahah. ok i didnt quite rest since i sustained yet ANOTHER injury.
warmed up for cage on monday night and had cage on tuesday which we could only reach the finals but could not win it. i cant believe it. the team s really strong but we couldnt create enough and contain all their attacks. i tried my best but i was covering too much all by myself. glad that i did my part for all the defensive work, the initialization for attacks and a thumping penalty in off the post. had a great time, but screwed my right hamstring after all the work.
and so i was limping for the rest of the week. wednesday off, friday drove.
saturday was a pretty productive day. some how, i felt all happy and chirpy to wake up at 9 and left for town alone with no friends to meet, only to settle my personal stuff. it s nice because you have all the freedom in the world. i guess this is just what i need before going through another round of crap coming up this week.
been stocking up my cells with nutrients over the weekend. meaning eating like no tomorrow because i know i m gonna lose yet ANOTHER 3KG in a week like the previous time out in the field. peeps, i found the fastest and healthiest way to lose weight, just visit the wilderness.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
appreciate
We just kept moving, it was mission after mission. I probably slept 5 hours for 5 days, and ate portions that i would usually eat for a single day only. However, all these would not be a problem on a normal day when you just sit around doing nothing. The activities kept us moving nonstop, some were even as intensive as running a marathon, some even worse. Pee was always yellow since we were always sweating, yes, sweating like a dog. Our bodies were pushed to the limits, no rest, no recovery, we kept going and going. Fatigue level rocketed sky high as each second passed. It was to the extent where you can sleep standing upright. I didn’t feel human for 5 days.
When it finally ended, we went back to greet surprises but little did i expect surprises to be as surprising as the initial surprise. Oh anyway we survived and went back for a shower. The clean cool water streamed through your hair, down the camou-ed face and the worn out body driving the dirt down the drain. It was refreshing, it reminded me how it feels to be alive, to be sanitised. It’s these little things that we take for granted every day. Sleep, food, sanitisation.
As i was walking home dressed in my uniform, with the bulky black bag of muddy clothes on my shoulder, i walked past the playground i ve been walking pass for almost all my life. The laughter and screaming of little kids enjoying their selves , the sound of the ball ramming against the void deck walls and the chirps of the birds which were bidding goodbye to the dimming sunrays. Upon hearing those, i just smiled to myself and the line came to my mind: “children having fun, while we are holding guns.” I thought, perhaps, what we are doing is indeed for a greater cause, indeed worth it afterall.
I dropped my bag got changed and went for a great dinner with my family at the airport. The ambience, the food, the company, just reminded me of the times i had when i was a kid, running to the viewing gallery to see the big planes and sitting on ronald’s lap eating my Happy Meal. But that day, i strolled to the same place, with hands in my pockets and just looked on. I didn’t even glance at the planes on the other side of the glass, but i found myself sitting down on a platform, not on ronald’s lap, simply admiring my mum’s eyes, my dad’s inquisitiveness, my sisters’ liveliness. And i wondered, how things have changed, how far i’ve come. More importantly, what’s closest to my heart.
It’s amazing how tough times make you appreciate these little things, especially your loved ones and the memories that have passed and will never come back. Cherish the present ones and enjoy every moment in the future. When i finally do find the other half who i can spend the rest of my life with, who i can join the Amazing Race with, who i can lay down my life for, i know i will give nothing less than what she deserves.
Saturday, November 06, 2010
class
last weekend was unexpectedly fun. i expected it to be kinda mundane and considering i just had a long tiring week.. but somehow the company was good. it s really important to have the balance in a group. just like a football team. you must have different types of players to make the team tick. there must be a willing goalkeeper, a hardcore centreback, a destroyer midfielder, a creative attacking spark, a touchline hugging winger, an out and out striker. and of course a captain, a leader to make them work altogether.
back to the topic, the reason why cliques can stay together is because either everyone in the group is goddamn similar, or everyone have totally different personalities. someone has to be the crazy one to suggest ideas, someone has to be there to take the lead and enforce it usually by joining in first, and someone has to be the joker to make retarded but hilarious comments and actions. however, someone has to be the coolheaded one and make sure things go smoothly, steering the group clear of potential danger and take care of them when situations do finally arise.
it s amazing how everything falls into place nicely without the members noticing, until you sit back and analyze why things happen the way it is. and i m glad i m in such a group.
there s another group i have which i know is there, it still exists, just that i ve been neglecting for so long. everyone s really so damn busy, i cant do much now. but i do have plans. everything will be just the way it was.
this weekend, a movie and class gathering. the movie was brilliant, not the inception brilliant, but good enough after resident evil. class gathering, felt bad to arrive so late. missed out on the interaction part. it was not bad actually, the food was about right, attendance was more than expected and the host IS someone i have utmost respect and fondness of. one of the best in his line around, and a very good man. sometimes you wonder, why is he still single??
haha i guess i have a lot to rant today. it s a day of opinion, a day of words (perhaps after a week of words since i had to talk so much, there s this momentum kept going).
next week will be the week of truth. the test. dirty, smelly, uncomfortable, minimal rest, minimal food, stressed out, exhausted, pushed beyond limits, heat rash, mosquitoes, sandflies, scorching heat, freezing storms, interrogation after interrogation ... everything you can think of. all packaged into a nice parcel to be opened by us next week. i will push till my mind blanks out, till my eyes see nothing but pitch black, till my limbs cramp up, my knees scream for mercy. that s the extent i ll go, just to get pass next week, and EARN the bar come january.
falling once was painful enough, i cant afford to fall once more. pray that i do survive to tell you about the experience.
it s all in the mind.
like a fool.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
physical vs mental
pretty straightforward weekend.
had driving lesson on friday after bookout, cousin s wedding on saturday at hilton hotel. doubled up as the reception fella at the lobby and a photographer. pretty busy but felt that at least i was useful. spent my entire sunday settling admin stuff and studying for a theory test that went ok i guess.
i m finally done destroying my knees! completed the final test for soc with a respectable timing of 7.59. and now after physical, it s back to studying.. everything must be shoved into the space between my eyebrow and hairline. great.
Monday, October 18, 2010
personal taste
i didnt do much this week but somehow i felt that it was quite well spent. went for a relaxing ramen meal at Central with 2 of my closer coursemates right after bookout. we roamed about the clarke quay after that and finally settled for some kungfu bubble tea. it was a really relaxed and carefree stroll with my buddies.
spent my saturday continuing watching personal taste which i finally finished! it s one of the few dramas that i would actually watch and commend. good plot, but a little too drama. the ost is really good though. kinda hooked onto it. it s amazing how someone can change so much under the influence of someone else.
went for supper with 5 other guys and my instructor at bedok 85. it was kinda gay but ultimately it turned out quite well. chill out session, didnt regret going even though so many pang sehed. HOWEVER, i m really getting too lazy. i m eating too much and working out too little. i always want to go run or swim but my legs are screaming. sustained a new injury on the left hip flexors, and i cant seem to do any exercise. walking is already a problem. seriously, at this rate i ll end the course in a wheel chair.
went shopping with family on sun! retail therapy as people call it. even though i ll always look at the price tag before picking the item up to have a closer look, when i have an objective in mind, i ll usually complete it without hesistating when i m locked on one. i guess that s the good thing about me. i get the therapy, without busting the budget! times are bad y'know. times are ALWAYS bad (fyi hahaha)
yea that was about it, booked in early to watch liverpool lose again. i ve got nothing to say man.. it s gonna be an eventful weekend coming up, so something to look forward to!
hope you guys are doing fine, whoever reads this.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
alive for a life.
i broke another barrier on friday. pushed till i could push no more. and the end result was worth smiling for. something i ve never achieved and i finally gotten it, the feeling was good. of course i cant just stop there, i have to better it next week.
rewards always come. sometimes you ve gotta seek them yourself. but somehow the weekend fell into place really nicely. we had another course cohesion, went for a movie after a long while - legend of the fist. good action, good company, and good popcorn! shaw s popcorn s still the most worthwhile. had a great steamboat dinner around bugis area before having frolick at tampines1. great day.
saturday was .. better. haha. ultimately, it s time spent with the closer people that seem more golden. subway lunch, teo heng, pasta mania dinner and some extras were excellent. i was dead tired at the end of the day, actually forgot that i had badminton early that morning. totally glad i organised this session.
paid off my fatigue debt on a sunday morning and woke up to a sumptous homecooked lunch followed by watching the addictive korean drama. it s really quite sweet. the type where you can go aww for some scenes.. and damn! when the bad characters plot evil deeds. hahaha. yea but the girl s actions and behaviour are really sweet.
it s been a wonderful week. cant ask for more. :D
Sunday, October 03, 2010
life? get one.
i spend my weekends
1) swimming
2) gyming
3) eating
4) sleeping
5) reading
6) watching tv
i cant believe i m actually following the korean drama on saturday nights.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
chi, makan, devour and savour
but after hooking them up, i felt sorry for them. we, humans, are banking on the lack of intelligence of animals for food. it s the cunning and merciless nature of us, to trick them, to tempt them, and to play with them. it s soooo sinful. when i pulled the prawns out, i saw them struggling, so alive, and i had to remove the hook, which often still has the bait on it. they didnt even get a last meal! how sad.
and worse, we pierce a satay stick right through them when they are still alive and kicking, and then throw them on the smoking bbq pit! burnt alive. so much for wanting to eat fresh seafood. and i had my retribution the next day - diarrhoea the whole day.
the highlight was suppose to be up next. carnivore at chijmes. really nice place, chijmes i mean. felt like a mini victorian village where people just drink and make merry behind stoned walls. great ambience. the food at carnivore was not bad too, but 45 bucks might be quite overpriced. ok maybe becuase i had too many prawns before that and didnt have much space for more meat. however, the grilled meat were skillfully cooked and seasoned, served hot and in right proportions. we were quite neglected since we were sitting inside. the meat were flying about in the open outside. it was good nevertheless.
left slightly earlier to meet up with family at city square farrer park where they had putien buffet dinner to celebrate my dad s birthday. was too stuffed to stuff more. couldnt even down a slice of cake when we got home.
spent the whole saturday diarrhoea-ing, but still managed to squeeze some time out to gym in a bid to get my fitness back. sunday was just slacking at home watching the phillipine drama series! lol. it was like 4 hours?? had dinner, booked in early and missed THE MATCH. liverpool lost but at least with dignity. my blood s always red. the free spirited and devil-free shade of red.
YNWA.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
SICK
i started to feel the symptoms that day and i knew i was going down. it s always the same, sore throat, the occasional and untimely sneeze and slight cough. you can feel it. and it sucks.
but i managed to hold it off for awhile, actually managed to have lunch with lois, gab, pin, ho and teo. burger at cine before resident evil late in the afternoon. it was quite bad. it gave me a prison break feel with wentworth miller in it, but damn fake. the calefares always die. how sad man. bumped into dr. jerome and caught up with him. could smell the freedom just by talking to him. the difference between someone deferring and someone in the thick of sewage.
broke up after the movie and had dinner with gab at hot tomatoes which is still reasonable in my opinion. bumped into ian chai who s gonna pop on the floating platform. and then went to walk walk, "retail therapy". nothing much.
saturday.. oh couldnt take it when i woke up. just went straight to polyclinic and i was excused from army half marathon. crap, missed such a big event. took the medicine, almost died on the bed, before waking up feeling kinda ok to go for class gathering at ms ye s house. queued for hokkien mee at bedok corner but was not complaining since i knew that was the norm, and arrived quite late. the atmosphere was quite dead and i couldnt add more life since i was already dying. i guess too many were absent. finally touched mahjong after quite some time but there wasnt much incentive to play properly (since no money involved!). just kept blocking.
otherwise, it was somewhat nice to see the class after quite some time and that night seemed a tad too short.
sunday, virus hit full blast and i just lay dead. went to doc for mc and he wanted to jab me since i was burning. 38.7. and i spent the next 2 days suffering in the spikes of the merciless virus. how to go back training like that??
found 2 pics in my phone. it was hui hui s birthday celeb at swensons.


pictures will be quite rare from now. gone were the days..
the gaze.
Sunday, September 05, 2010
a beautiful mess
had a xiao long bao buffet last week after bookout with my coursemates and instructors. partly to celebrate eugene's birthday and partly as a cohesion. it was quite a good session, and we ate till we almost exploded. i probably downed 30 baskets of xlb s all by myself in just over an hour, not to forget there was still the steamboat. crystal jade will close down if people like me patronise daily man. went back only to drop dead on my bed yet again. it s just the friday norm, after soc in the morning and another physically demanding thing in the afternoon.
went for a swim on sun followed by another buffet at sakura downtown east before booking in right away. the quality wasnt there, and the singaporean spirit was clearly portrayed there and then. i m never going back there again, especially since with the same cost, i can go for a hotel buffet. which i think, it ll be quite some time before i get the craving again. totally stuffed after last week.
this week, fri, aunt treated to imperial palace at tampines1. she ordered something like a 12 course meal, even better than a wedding dinner. the food was good but it was like another grenade in my stomach.
ah take a break from food, took my btt (FINALLY) on sat after waiting for like 3 months? passed it and i m gonna wait for another 3 months just to take ftt. crazy crazy wait.
headed down to city hall to meet up with ying lun, guan ming and jackston to jalan jalan before walking in circles trying to find raffles place. there s so many new things popping out in town and i had no clue until yesterday. it was an eye opener. suddenly singapore seem so big! ended up at raffles place and met up with reuben and his friends and went to marina promontory for Chunk Fest 2010. quite disappointed because 1. it s not free. 2. there was no atmosphere. 3. i spent $9 for 2 scoops when i could have bought a whole tub with that money. damn.
cruised around before finally deciding to eat at plaza sing, manhattan fish market. going to ps brought back many good memories. 1 year ago i was probably there for a movie, eating the indonesian food at the food court or bolognaise at pasta mania in sa uniform. anw, went home earlier since the rest were going for a party and i wasnt invited... :( haha jk jk, was quite tired after waking up early. usually sat is a day to sleep in and just rot at home, ok to recover from the whole week.
today, went for a swim again at civil service club changi and had a good and reasonable meal at the restaurant there before booking in. that s about it, life s been pretty much slow pace. it must speed up!!!
short week coming up!
Monday, August 23, 2010
a mountain
i returned to the arms of my loved ones last friday, feeling the warmth and togetherness, especially a dinner right after bookout at IKEA. it s always IKEA. i sat at the dining table, sometimes feeling like as if there s so much to say but in the end realising there s nothing to say.
after pondering on it for some time, i think i know what i wanted to say, now that i m typing this not from home. here it goes: i just wanna say i love all of them and am very grateful for everything they have done for me, being always there for me. even though every week i go home to be a nuisance to everyone (hahaha) the activities and events will always be build with respect to my schedule. today, i walk up the stairs, look down the corridor and feel this sense of emptiness. it s so quiet and eerie, with the occasional rain drop, the cool breeze blowing. i am reminded who are the ones that are ranked number 1 in my heart and it is in these times that they come to my mind first.
i slacked for the whole saturday, parking in front of the tv to watch the YOG and then decided to go for a swim. my dad offered to sent me to safra just as i was getting ready to take public transport. this is the time when the sound effect comes in : awwwwww.......
haha, but seriously, i m thankful for such great parents. my dad who drops all his work to send me back to camp and my mum who ll always prepare my book in stuff before anything else if i need and to my sisters who just irritate me all day long, asking me to spend money on them. yea i will, eventually, just not unnecessary money.
i feel sorry, and upset with myself. for not studying hard enough for the test today even though i spent the whole sunday on it, and for not really understanding my friends, exactly how they feel or what they are thinking. i simply assumed everyone s busy with their lives and we should just take a break. but when in fact, i have friends who are dying of boredom and loneliness, to revive that sense of belonging once more, to bring back the good old times. i am grateful for such friends. you know who you are. i ll make things happen, dun worry.
maybe life aint that bad afterall. sometimes, you just gotta push yourself harder, for the sake of a better tomorrow.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
hi, i'm bored, and very boring.
training was good, apart from some side effects. and my liver worked hard on thurs.
anyways, met up with the usual peeps on fri immediately after bookout to shop for yong pin s present. thanks to the mad rush to get out, i was in uniform and my phone was dying. before i manage to read the sms from huihui, it conked out. and so, i was stranded in raffles city, LOST once again. ah ok here s an interesting story:
i remember when i was about 5 or 6, i was lost there too. as a really kaypoh kid, i was looking at some kiddy performance schedule and when i turned back, everyone disappeared!! i remained calm and searched level 1 and b1 but couldnt find the adults. then i started to panic and the sour sour taste (yknow the taste prior to crying) started to overwhelm me. but as a good kid, i always had one 10cent coin and one 20cent coin in my little pocket and my aunt made sure we remembered all the crucial numbers, like 999, 995, the home number and her hp number. so i went to the nearest payphone to try and make a call. BUT i was too short!! i had to jump and hit the handset down before i can make a call. yep and i managed to get though and waited at the same place where they lost me. i think i cried like a baby when i met them again! hahaha! that s lost and found case 1.
now, fast forward probably 14 years, i was lost again, in the same place. no form of communication tool. not a single 10cent or 20cent coin. not a single PHONE NUMBER i can remember! hahahaha. i was dead. at least the sour sour taste wasnt there. luckily for me, my phone was good enough to let me switch it on and glance at huihui s number which i chanted for the next 15 minutes, just to embed it in my memory. i tried all the free hotel phones, but obviously cant. went to the swissotel and fairmount concierge but they were too busy with yog to care about me. so i went to raffles city concierge and asked politely for usage of their phone. yep and i was found again! lost and found case 2.
that was a bit of drama. but it s good, it makes you feel alive. situations, problems and more importantly, find the damn solution.
ok, and we travelled to marina for dinner at Changing Appetite which i had a really well prepared creamy sphagghetti with chicken and mushroom. it s like heaven after 11 hellish meals. enjoyed the time walking about, sitting at starbucks, playing some lame game and a late journey home.
had a FANTASTIC 12 hour sleep. it s the type of sleep you wake up and feel like doing a triatholon. nah but everywhere was still quite sore. watched 2 movies in the afternoon before going down to vivo to meet up for yong pin s birthday. decided on King Louis. nice place. good ambience, good food, and good price. the package was the real deal man. but the extra beer killed it off. $10 bucks extra!!! but in the end, i guess it was all worth it. brilliant night. moved to tiong bahru to present the present and finally went home again to catch chelsea thrash west brom 6-0.
badminton today, washed the car, and simply slacked. i need this rest for another hectic week coming up. ok that s about it. tata!
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
galore
there was a live range held over the following week and i couldnt get what i wanted. stupid mistakes cost you dearly. haiya, so i guess i was quite emo for that period. yea, but i think i ve gotten over it. thursday was half day! went home straight and headed down to vivo with family. nah, i didnt had buffet, but dinner was as good as buffet. indulged in the flavours of sinagpore at food republic. chicken wing, satay, beef hor fun, popiah, hokkien mee, char kway teow, ice kachang etc. just ate till perchar! never knew i missed singapore food that much even though i never left! went window shopping with the females as usual and my mum will try to teach me fashion. which always fail miserably. i m just a simple person trying to lead a simple life man!
anyways, the walkabout was good, even though i spent most of the times in tangs, f21, topshop, those shops that sell heels higher than ice kachang and many more. was dead tired and conked out on the way home. spent saturday and sunday with family. sunday playing badminton as usual and ran to Giant from the CC for lunch and stank up the whole place doing grocery shopping. went back, mahjong with granny and watched something decent on tv. it was about sun wukong speaking english.
yep, but monday was the fun day. met up with huihui for lunch and then lois to sing song, relieve stress. it was quite impromptu but some things dun need much planning. just go with the flow and everything will turn out great. and so, went in sian again, but at least it s a short week!
Sunday, July 25, 2010
rough and tough
we started a new phase. and the real thing started. but before that, i couldnt resist playing street during one of the nights and got whacked in the face by an arm while defending a shot. some part of my tongue was bitten off.
woke up the next day with a bad sore throat. so my entire mouth was killing me. but i still went gyming and resulted in soreness in every inch of muscle. the chin up regime started and my arms were about to explode. but then came the freak incident bayonet to stab my dear right palm 2cm deep. perhaps even deeper. no stitches required since the palm auto closes when left on its own. and so, i became a left hander since that day.
yep that just added to my list of injuries sustained over my very loooongg 19years. i m not careless, i m just plain stupid.
booked out and watched sorcerer's apprentice. it was an okay movie, the only thing that left an impact was the onerepublic song. secrets. i m hooked to it.
met up with reuben and gang after that at tcc clarke quay to chit chat till they chased us out close to 1am. it was not bad a ketchup session. had to take the nightrider home though. banged my head continuously on the window and seat until everyone behind me was laughing like mad. was dead tired that day. reached home close to 3 and slept till 2 the next day.
slacked at home till at night and went out for inception with ying and gang. brilliant show. no wonder it s movie of the year contender. managed to catch the last train home.
today, suppose to have a table outing but only 5 could go. in the end the 4 of us guys went to taka to walk and wisma to sit at starbucks. ok la, it was still not bad. the place brought back many good memories. and i had espresso frap finally in like 2 years! but that just reminded me how much i ve splurged for the past few days. still gotta pay for things in camp! going broke.
that s about it, gotta book in soon..
Sunday, July 18, 2010
good week
actually, i looked back at the previous post and i cant justify what i posted. i cant remember why i was THAT sad or emo. maybe it was the early book in that caused the sian-ess and the feeling was exaggerated. yea i was unhappy about some stuff last week, dun ask me what because i cant put it into words.
anyways, i m happy this week because my effort paid off for ippt. havent ran for about a month and took an ippt. the result was - cannot jump, cannot run. trained hard for the next ippt and retained my gold and ahem some incentives. :D
had a good nights out on wednesday, accompanying my family.
the feeling of going shopping right after booking out on friday is awesome. not so much about the shopping, but just going out to walk, see and feel the world, and with having good company for dinner and just talking. it s nice.
and singing songs on saturday! celebrated huihui s birthday, with her not knowing it, since she ll never agree to it. songs, they facilitate the release of perhaps tension, or unhappiness within and bring fun and laughter when it s sung in a funny way. hahah especially when you cant really sing. laughing at yourself, laughing at your friend or just laughing at laughter. it s pure joy. dinner and had an interesting chat after that. it s seriously becoming a habit man. haha. good fun good company.
and doing stupid things at the garden festival at suntec on sunday with family was somehow becoming quite hard to come by. it was quite tiring to pose at every flower and leaf and cover 2 levels of plants! conked out on the way home. but it was fun to be someone not really yourself around people you know too well. you just do and say stupid things and the reaction will be totally unexpected.
ok i think i shall stop here and go to sleep soon!
till next week, tata.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
stress
can you imagine, every action you make, every word you speak, someone s scrutinizing, waiting to pounce.
can you imagine, living in a world that offers no room for error.
how would you feel?
anyways, i had fish and co and marche this weekend as input, but not much output. that means i m gonna die on wednesday. how to run??
sent sam off at the airport on sat. sincerely hope she does well in aussie!
that s about it.
i don't feel right.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
thurs, fri, sat, sun
anyways, back to my mundane life. i watched ANOTHER movie on thurs. ip man 3. it wasnt as good as the first 2 but ok, good to watch. i cant believe they reused the same actor for a different role. that s damn cheapskate.
fri. oh it was supposed to be a family day. there was some plans to bbq but in the end NATO. (no action talk only) so we ended up visiting Marina Bay Sands. to be honest, the place is quite impressive. the architecture and the view. it gained some plus points whenever a cool breeze blew, coz it rained that morning. but many shops aint opened yet. all big names. just walked around, checked out the toilet at Paiza, the hotel. yea not bad. haha.
oh there s the YOG park also. they are doing some preparation for the opening ceromony i guess. and just across, they are preparing the road for the F1 coming up. singapore s damn busy.
anyways, we went back to marina square for dinner. so to make up for the failed bbq, we had yuki yaki. it was quite enjoyable for once. started inventing new dishes with whatever was provided. and of course, stomach was filled to the brim. shopped around for furniture and groceries at curry4 after that. it was quite a good day.
saturday. spent the whole day packing my stuff, getting ready to move house. from jurong, to paya lebar. the things are getting more and more. last time it was only BMT stuff. now there s BMT + OCS stuff. then next time, i will have BMT + OCS + AFTC stuff to bring home and to probably chong pang camp.
and i finally went to exercise! damn lazy. swam at safra for about an hour, felt good.
ok i m finally finally finally starting to learn a new skill, procrastinate too much. and IT is fun. but need lots of practise. till next week, tata.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
an almost perfect day
seriously, i cant remember what happened on monday and tuesday if you ask me now. yea, right now. ok lemme think.
oooo kkk.
monday. met up with huihui at changi international airport for mcdonald s breakfast at 10plus. then sam joined. and gabriel joined. then logs joined from a silkair plane. so the mainpoint was my SPINACH, which never came. instead, we had chicken and very nice mash potatoes and fries. quite a worthy trade. yep so anw, babarella came back with lots of mosquito bites which was kinda expected, slightly worse than coming back from pulau ubin aka the mosquito and sanflies breeding island. after much scratching, we packed her in a taxi and splitted up.
met up with family at a really weird place. farrer park city square. never been there before. but it s really nice and spacious with big name shops that sadly no one frequents. it would be a good hangout to be honest. had pizza for dinner and i actually bought a pair of jeans. it s like a miracle. a new piece of clothing that doesnt originate from SAF hanging in my closet in this period. wow.
tuesday. oh. aunt treated swensons and haagen daz. i was stuffed. should seriously start exercising man.
wednesday. aha. brilliant day. the reason why i m typing at this time, because i dun wanna forget this feeling and exactly what i thought.
collected certs back in sa. felt a little nostalgia. ok not that i had a lot of happy memories in school, but when i saw the pitch, i recalled how i was strutting during the track + sc vs teachers match. how the sun was setting at that moment, giving the oranje hue. and the red track that i ran like a dog 3 times a week. check the ground and you can find my sweat still there. the blue basketball court, the place we played our class captain ball. the canteen where i gobbled my favourite chicken rice and BANANA MILK. aww. the lecture theatres. damn, i kinda miss the bio lectures. the cc where i slept like crazy. hahaha. oh the TOILET! where i spend much of the time standing in front of the fan because it s only fan that can be fixed!
haiya, but you go back, think of all the great times, only to receive something that doesnt make you feel great. i dunno how to put it. but unfortunately, even if i turn back time 1 year ago, i would still do the same, because i ve done my best in the time i had. j1 killed everything. that s the reason why i keep telling my juniors to go study whenever i see them. especially ryan. i must save private ryan!
back to reality. and some fun. we migrated to marina square kbox to relive an illegal session 2 years ago, about the same time. it was fun. even though i cant sing. i managed to make some noises that some how resembled some music, i hope. hah! yea gotta agree with gay, it was abit too short.
travelled back to tampines to watch TWO movies in a row at gv with aunt and sis. TOY STORY 3. the front was kinda slow, but everything fell nicely in the end. it s worthy of probably a 4.5 star. there was this particular scene when the boy finally decided to give away his toys. and i had to hold back some tears then - because i understood how he felt. i can decide to act MAN and laugh it off but learning to confront the feeling requires some real courage. it s about how you become attached to the items that helped you grow up, spend your precious childhood, and how you finally outgrow them. we were all kids. we played with toys, ran around the house like no one s business, role played and rolled all over the floor, and i have to say i had fun doing those lame stuff and i loved my toys. it was the only time of carefree and letting loose.
there was this point the boy made that struck me: the toys, they will always be there for you.
it s not all about the toys. it s about how WE should be like the toys, how we should be there for one another in times of need and be the pillar or crying shoulder for the people around you. especially since now we (ok maybe just me) i dun talk to toys anymore, i talk to people. i dunno about you, but i had a reasonably good childhood, so i felt it.
next up was KARATE KID. 2 hour 20 min. worth it. a good ending, but it was all expected. perhaps the way the good guy won was eye catching, and that s why it s good. hahah but it kinda got me a little hyped up to do some BCCT aka basic close combat training. i was looking forward to Intermediate CCT in army ocs but now... air force. nope. anyway the movie was cool.
yep that s it. a day of entertainment. brilliant day. this is block leave. :D
Sunday, June 20, 2010
a chapter concluded.
here s the breakdown:
6 feb 10 +
9 weeks bmt in tekong
1 week block leave
19 april 10 +
2 weeks clm in safti ocs
7 weeks afst in safti ocs
1 week block leave
soon to come:
28 june 10 +
26 weeks afpt in aftc
3 weeks joint term in safti ocs
= COMMISSIONING
ok, that s being positive, and STILL assuming, my knee doesnt give way, i dun do stupid things, and i dun have baygon sprayed all over me.
looking back, it has been 20 weeks in NS! that s an astonishing approximate 5 months. i dunno whether i can declare "time flew" because it didnt quite fly by THAT quickly. it required some amount of praying that the day ends faster, some gritting of the teeth, some trembling of the limbs and quite a significant amount of merrymaking. hahaha. it has been significant.
the last week in safti was er... erm... not so challenging. social night on friday and it was okay. rounded up the term with the closer friends i made in afst, which werent that many, but i m prepared to form some covalent bonds with the gbad guys.
all i m doing now is slacking. so, ask me out next week, before i start to rot at home!
enjoy life people!
Sunday, June 13, 2010
a real weekend. for once.
one year older now. and i guess i m on the steeper part of the exponential learning curve. been gaining some vital life lessons for the past year. chionging hard for A s, chionging hard for the soccer ball, chionging up the hill with my rifle and my buddy. basically chionging. learnt a lot for the 4 months in NS now. mainly learning to be independent, dealing with people of different social backgrounds and sucking my thumb. real hard.
worked hard during the weekdays and had a well deserved break over the weekend. booked out on friday after scrubbing the toilet bowl as usual, and had a boomz buffet dinner at The Line, Shangri la, with the first match of the 2010 FIFA World Cup screening while i chomp away in a brilliant setting. That s life man.
And i had a nice undisrupted sleep on my comfortable bed with the air con blowing that night. When i woke up, i had no homework! Spent the whole day storming down orchard area. i had a good time actually. even though it was quite tiring.
sunday was just as good. nice sleep, good family breakfast and lunch, then had a karaoke session with the guitar and piano, laughed at Babarela on xinmsn and packed up to head to jurong for sakae dinner. and finally here i am, contented with a full stomach, mentally recharged, physically rested, ready to sprint the last stretch, the last week in safti.
life, oh life.
Sunday, June 06, 2010
all alone
the past week seemed damn long.
my buddy left. we had a long heart to heart talk on the last night and i realised the best thing that happened to me since the start of air force service term was to have him as a room mate. we are somewhat similar in many ways, the only difference lies in that he has a hell lot more life experience and made decisions that i have to make soon. being at the cross roads of life, it is fortunate for me to have some valuable advice thrown down by a senior. it was a good night.
i met another good fella on friday. he was another senior. and the tips and preview he gave gave me some mental preparation for what to come. it isnt gonna be easy but still it wouldnt be as depressing as what the army guys are going through. they seem so... sad. even if they dun manage to pull through, they have already earned my respect. just compare to some others.. i can only sigh.
celebrated my birthday which still has a countdown on everyday s newspapers (there is only one countdown at the moment) on saturday with gay, ape and 2 nineteen year olds. haha we are really running out of ideas. but it was something new in a way. i was dead tired yesterday so pardon my lethargy and sianess. thanks peeps for everything.
the PROJECT. chionged till 3am yesterday but i still couldnt complete. fell asleep while doing it. seriously exhausted. finally completed it about an hour ago.
checked my knee. it should be fine. i just need to do a Jamie Carragher for the moment. Capello just have to come at the right moment.
i still havent found a solution to the problem for next friday. and i have to find soon. real soon.
everyday, there s this feeling. i cant really describe. it s a mixture of wanting to cry, wanting to shout, wanting to grab something but there s nothing to grab, wanting to swallow something sweet but the taste s only sour. It s just so damn complex is frustrating.
just sigh.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Pitstop
let's go!
Sunday, May 16, 2010
week 4 and counting
finally had a decent weekend. went to town yesterday to meet friends. caught FeMan II at the Cathay with yinglun, jeremy + gf, and reuben. had a brilliant ketchup session with them. after ying lun s sharing, i m grateful for what i m given. not taking anything for granted.
that s about it i guess. oh yea, visited the doc just now to get some medicine. no way i m gonna miss lectures. it s like back to studying all over again.
life s good.
thank you.
hope everyone else s doing fine.
let s goooo! another week!
Saturday, May 08, 2010
chapter II
i cant say much about what went on for the past 3 weeks. but i can say that i m no more green. but now blue. ok maybe i m still partially green in some sense, but i m officially and technically blue from now onwards.
i m halting here for a while.
because i have to think before typing.
ok.
learnt quite a bit so far. missed life on the outside, missed people, thought about stuff and went through some tough times. both physically and mentally. but more of mental. for once, i had to pause, take out a book and a pen, list out problems and come up with solutions. and everyday i attempt to apply them.
it s a new dimension of challenge. trapped within a boundary of unfamiliar scenarios, feeling uncomfortable. but it s a stage of becoming independent and facing the real world. the artificial environment created for me since i was born has finally collapsed. there s no longer maternal wings to hide beneath, no longer filtering walls of separation, no longer shields of steel to take the blows. i stand alone.
a new chapter has begun.
but you'll never walk alone.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
a new journey
friday was posting results day. and i got ocs. feelings? excited perhaps. glad that i ve been given a chance to do something right for once. i guess i should be fine if i dun come back here and announce my right knee gave way, or my back broke or i sprained both ankles for the 4073288th time. short term goal - get through 3 weeks confinement.
class dinner at handburger that night. comforting to see most of the class doing ok and good to catch up with some of them. had an aptitude test the next morning, wont expect much in return.
sat, supposedly a clique outing, lunch at jack s at marina and then kick ass movie. funny show but i was more obsessed with the salted popcorn. hahaha. havent tasted it for a long long long time. sorry peeps if i hogged it for too long!
haha caught this on the way home on friday night. the boy was really adorable. he was sitting there holding his sketchbook and colour pencils, wanting to close his eyes, but still looking around, then closed gradually, then opened and look around before finally closing in peace. the innocence is priceless. i never remembered being that tired to be able to fall asleep sitting on the floor after probably an art class? and when the train reached their stop, the mom stood up and just walked to the door before realising her boy was still there. she called out softly and he jumped awake, rubbing his eyes and without a word of complain or reluctance, he duly followed his mom.
should i say maturity at such a young age?
up to you to guage.
sunday. last day out. settled the stuff left and had a last meal with family. ok getting tired now, going to sleeeeeeeppp!
cya in 3 weeks time. i hope. :)
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
pop
ok ok let s be a liiiiiilllllltttttttllleee bit more cheerful. i completed 24km route march. that s a WOW factor. it was quite bad at that time. but looking back, it s not that bad. apart from the after effects of the march, which includes a migraine on the right side of my head, burning temperature, heat rashes, abrasions, blisters, back aches, and fatigue, it isnt that bad. i havent collapsed yet, which means, my mind was still in control, which means i could still walk further!
yea call me nuts.
anyways, block leave has been pretty much quite boring. slept my whole saturday away, ok throw in a bit of mahjong. then chalet on sunday with section 2. rundown place but spacious and it was quite a good gathering overall. blasted the place with my amp, someone brought a ps2, the bbq was not bad, there was drunk action and we had some sleep. so, everything was pretty much in place. really proud to find a diamond in the section. self sacrificial, organised, loyal, funny and a gentleman. rare rare rare. i hardly had to do anything for once at all. thanks marcus.
tue, accompanied mom to hospital for operation. everything s well. wed, met ying lun and went for nationals at cck stadium. sa did well. fantastic job. then had a mad rush hour with ying lun and nic kang since the commando was going to be late for book in. 30 buck cab ride. thrilling.
one thing i wanted to type about for quite some time. i just dun geddit. what do people actually see? seriously. virtues? or they just cant see them? or they ignore them? or they interpret them so damn differently? i really have no clue. what s wrong with the world?
read a book, read between the lines, see behind the words, get the basis, get to what the hell the book is about. see something good, like it. see something bad, hate it. simple as that. why are there people who read incorrigible books and still love them? what do they see in such a book? are there no distinct universal catergories for good and bad?
Saturday, April 03, 2010
lights out: zero eight zero zero
haha another miracle happened 2 days back: we were the first to book out, meaning a long weekend. and so we made plans for a good night out as a section on a very Good Friday. met up with slayers for clash of the titans at lido but i had to pang seh them for lan to meet up with p3s2. had this " oh so familiar " feeling when i was with them, sad to miss the lan session. but there will be other times i m sure.
and so, i met marcus and syafiq then lim wee came along at orchard mrt. bussed to zouk and had a hellavu night. if you are imagining me dancing like a mad dog then please halt. party started quite late but it was at most 20 min of high-ness and it was the beginning of a pretty amazing night. shallnt go into details but i was almost moved to tears by someone i see practically almost every day now. the revelations, confessions or simply what came from the bottom of the heart. when the cerebral doesnt control the gate to secrets, or pent up feelings or the stuff in the stomach, literally everything comes out.
last night i witnessed
loyalty
passion
friendship
brotherhood
determination
selflessness and ...
love.
i learnt something. everything you do has an impact on someone else. everything. every single little thing.
and the previous post is justified.
it's not what you leave behind,
but what you are about to gain.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
the alphabet that ranged from letter A to letter U
i dun think i displayed any signs of depression or suicidal thoughts though. haha. perhaps, it could be what was predicted or thought as positive and a blessing in disguise. a time offerred to me as a period of reflection, and a duration of confession of what i truly thought about myself. whether anyone else understood was an entire different matter.
but i guess, this is growing up. when you ve gone through real shit, and survived it. you ve grown up. that s life. just accept things, take it into stride and keep moving. there s always a way out. if not, just keep digging under till you find one. there are many other things to look forward to not just those to dwell upon.
let's go!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
TO THE LIMIT? IT'S BEYOND LIMITS.
i woke up this morning feeling awesome. well it s not that i suddenly went bonkers in order to get this feeling. but when i thought about how life was the day before and i compare it to today, i m just glad.
and yea, i realised i ve been way too dreary. let s start looking on the bright side of life for once.
and weekends, rock. no, actually i m referring to saturday afternoons to sunday evenings. and that s good enough. always better than nothing. :D
be appreciative.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
a brand new kind of life
should i say i was complacent? or confident?

anyways, put the serious stuff aside. it s time for the festive mood! CNY. reunion dinner today, hardly a reunion at all. just the usual people that appear during weekends. tomorrow should be better, i hope. dun be too confident about it, expect less, anything more will be a surprise. a pleasant one.

kiddos all grown up. and now i m ranked lower than them. it s like taking the prelims for 4 years, and now, i m taking the final examination for 2 years. i can say that, the prelims are way easier than the final exam. but at least, i braced myself for it.
just 8 more times. in the mean time, i have to decide, whether i want more of it. am i up for the challenge? i know now, it definitely is.
valentines day.
i miss japan and bintan.
and a life.
Saturday, February 06, 2010
TIM
because to him, i can only express remorse and regret. if i ever made a promise, i ll stay true to it. i mean my word. BUT, i broke not 1, not 2 but 3 promises i made to tim. i m so ashamed.
so tim, if you still remember (i highly suspect you dun), please forgive me.
the promises were:
ONE : Plan Z. we'll sit by that cambodian beach and watch the sunrise.
TWO: i will organise an all guys outing.
THREE: i m suppose to tell you something when the time is right, because you told me yours.
i fulfilled none. i suppose i can make amends by changing the beach to the one at ECP or pasir ris park. the poker nights should make up for 2. and 3, i ll say, the time aint right. or maybe it was, you know, but you missed the auspicious hour. anyway, sorry dude.
going in tomorrow. completed tasks like going to chinatown for the festive mood, done with all the cleaning, installing football frenzy, and a good dinner with the 5. alright that s about it. bring on the new challenge! if it even is.
negative, over.
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
the unsolved puzzle.
life is a path lined with rough rocks. it ain't easy to stroll down the path. there are bound to be obstacles. times that you fall and your knees are scraped and bleeding. times that you rise from the falls and heed the wounds. and there are times that you stand tall and look back, looking at how far you've come. looking at the amount of blood, sweat and tears shed and what they were shed for. it's amazing to realize what are the things you put in effort for, trying to make it all right, the things that you care for. and also to find out the many times that things didn't go your way, didn't go as planned. perhaps, it's fate. maybe, that rocky path was there all the while, you are just walking down a one-way street. or maybe, you can create your own path.
i don't know.
but i know something. if you don't try, you never know it might be possible. just try. make it your best shot. and someday, you might just create the path you wanted all along.
i tried. so hard that i'm tired.
then i wonder. perhaps, it's really fate.
only time will tell, or has it been told?
am i fated to fall and never stand up again??
Monday, February 01, 2010
since that night, i couldnt sleep.
life s pretty boring. and everyone make it seem like i m gonna die in a few days time. which is true to a certain extent. no more civilian life. but i m kinda glad in a way. being a student for two thirds of your life, suddenly, the occupation blank changes its content. that s something new.
let s grow up, it s time to be fully independent. serve the nation dudes!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
the rotting days..
the highlights were:
1. ying lun and jun jie puking and shitting at the same time on Wan Seri Beni (the ferry) due to violent turbulence, eating a cup noodle and puking instantly.
2. ying lun got scammed at a restaurant at the shopping village Oleh Oleh.
the story:
he ordered Kampung Nasi Goreng.
i ordered Kampung Nasi Goreng, sama sama.
the food came.
ying lun got Kampung Nasi Goreng (fried rice).
i got Kampung Nasi Goreng SPESIAL (fried rice PLUS nice and big deep fried chicken wing).
the best part, Kampung Nasi Goreng and Kampung Nasi Goreng SPESIAL, both sama sama, S$5. ying lun went wtf. LOL.
so, ever since, everywhere we went for meals, we always ordered the SPESIAL version, hoping there will be a free chicken wing. hahaha. even the petrol, SPESIAL price, got free chicken wing added to the petrol tank.
3. jun jie s favourite phrase to chase everyone. since moving slowly is termed as slowly, to move faster, we should move fastly. FASTLY ftw.
4. all we did was to bask by the poolside and played water polo in the afternoons. everyone became black after that.
5. roller coaster ride at night. in the taxi. almost died. no lights, not even traffic lights, no seat belt.
6. watched a marathon of matches in the room.
7. and owe yew tong 25 points in hearts.
yep that s about it. the ride home was safe. managed to sleep, nice and smooth.
and after coming back, it was just spring cleaning almost every day or just reading jeffery deaver s books. loved roadside crosses. great read.
spent $17 on newton hawker food with 5 minus 1. went back to visit the kiddos too. all grown up. but quite screwed up. will go again probably next week before going to another island.
ok gotta work now. cage.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
back from bintan
it was good, if not, great. i dun think i m giving credit to the place, but to the company. ok maybe some credit to the venue, giving us the chance to get away from the hustle and bustle, just lying on the long ratan chair, enjoying the sea breeze and warm sun. it was a brilliant trip with lovely people. fun filled shit. hahah i love the new terms created. ok ok i shall upload some pics and account the whole thing for memory sake. that s what this blog is for anyway.
cage today. dead tiring. gave it my all, upped the game. nice session.
spring cleaning commences tomorrow i guess. or maybe the day after. gotta offer my free services. that s about it. till i m free, ta.
i will go nuts, that is,
if you haven't driven me.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
New Year





Went to the Flyer with buddies yinglun, junjie and jeremy. there was zero atmosphere. everyone at the Flyer whipped out their cameras and just videoed the whole thing. hardly any cheering, or people going wild. just mr. su making those weird noises. hahaha. yea but that s what the countdown s for right? just make a fool of yourself. the bangla workers certainly enjoyed themselves, hogging the dancefloor. that s working hard in 2009, playing harder in 2010.
